I love fall.

It’s a season of opportunity. A season to plan for transformation and then to wait for the right things life has in store for you.

I love fall. As the leaves turn color, their surprise potential is over whelming. One never knows what one holds inside them, what mysteries lurk in the depth, it’s only the right circumstances that bring it out. Sometimes it requires an inner change of season, color, approach and attitude. What follows is unabated eruption of vivid colors leading eventually to a new life, new perspective.

I love fall. There are no commitments. It could be cold and crisp, or unusually warm and humid. No obligations. Just going with the flow. Taking life as it comes. Giving up and starting over. No questions asked.

Fall is the season of redemption. To get away from what has been, embrace the impending change and then letting it go. Letting go is the only choice to start over. Resisting the cycle of nature, destiny and fate is futile. Letting go will lead to transformation, rebirth and rejuvenation .
We all hold on to things that once were full of life and vibrant, they moved with the wind, they responded to the rays of the sun but then times change. And what follows is gradually the withdrawal of the vigor and life substance, and when it happens, colors change, brighten, make room for more and go.

Trees let go gracefully, bowing to nature’s will, choosing to be vulnerable open and naked. We need to do the same. Then, there is the wait.
The wait for life to turn around and return with a force that is twice and strong, ripping through layers and forcing vitality to drench its new being. New hope, new will, new goals. I love fall.

So whatever is holding you back in life, whatever is not serving you, whatever that has run its course needs to be let go of. The cycle of nature demands renewal. Whether it’s a toxic attachment or an unhealthy relationship, if it has lost its vitality, it needs to be shed. Yes it will feel barren for sometime, but spring always follows fall.

Sometimes its hard to have faith in spring. I have seen brown leaves sometimes stuck to a tree even though their time has passed, they aren’t serving the tree, just taking up space to impede the growth of new buds.

 

 

We all justify why unhealthy attachments should persist. Nature, when ready to let go, sheds it all with great might. The key is the insight to the soul. Knowing when your fall has arrived.  There is a reason fall is short. Changes are always drastic and require intense work over a short period of time. If fall went on for months, the intensity and need for change would be lost. Progress happens in intense bursts. You put in the effort and then wait for the results.

Fall teaches us anticipation. Anticipation of what is to come and what is to leave. It encompasses a broad range of transition, from subtle to intense.
Embrace it, embrace life with all its seasons. If fall never came, life would be monotonous and boring. Reinventing life requires a good look at the bigger picture and then deciding a course of action. We all change during the process, we all change colors, we all redeem ourselves, grow, transform and blossom again.

I went through my fall last year and am now waiting for the flowers to bloom.

The month of October is upon us. The surge of pink is impending. Admittedly, everything looks cuter with a little pink in it. At least that’s my take on it. But there is nothing remotely cute about Breast Cancer.

Absolutely nothing.

I still embrace pink. I am aware. O God, I am so aware of this illness. Every 14 minutes someone gets diagnosed with this illness. How can anyone not be aware? Awareness is a good thing, raising awareness is a good thing.

I was aware, aware for the last 20 years that this is a fatal illness. When I said goodbye to my aunt, I was aware what breast cancer can do. So aware of the trauma her kids underwent.

I was aware, as I sat with my other aunt during her chemo infusions at the hospital, taking time off from my medical school classes to keep her company.

I was aware that some survive, others don’t.

I examined my self regularly since my 20s. I was very familiar with the texture of my dense breast. Lumpy and nodular especially before my cycle. My first mammogram was at 25 years of age.

I was always familiar with a breast surgeon in my network of doctors. I breastfed two children for over a year each.

I was aware of the risks.

I had 2 mammograms six months apart prior to my cancer, a 7 cm mass that never formed a lump. Just a change in the texture of the breast tissue, that only I could tell felt different.

I was aware of the density issue, I had an ultrasound too, which was normal.

Yes, awareness and mammograms help, but in the end, it was my gut feeling that made me locate the lump in my armpit. A swollen axillary lymph node that is never good news.

So those that read this today, please, examine yourself, know your body and your breasts. Mammograms do save lives but maybe not yours. For me, mammograms were a false sense of security. It was a self-exam that saved my life.

So when you see the pink ribbons all over, ask yourself, when was the last time I properly examined my breasts? When was the last time my doctor taught me how to examine my breasts?

Know your genetic risk, I don’t have the BRCA gene but due to two family members, my risk was higher. Know your family history.

Take care of yourself, eat well and exercise. I did all of that. I still got cancer but it was my fate based on my genetic makeup.

Your outcome can be different, why wouldn’t you give your self that chance?