by I dream of a pasture of kale with a dusting of quinoa and chia seeds in which I roll in as I swing my long luscious hair in them. There are fountains of pomegranate juice that splash the goodness over me, I lick a drop off of my finger. I wear organic cotton clothes and my T shirt says GMO free, BPA free, free, free , free. I am the free range cancer patient gallivanting through a chemical free world. When I get hungry , I just graze on the kale and spinach near by. The lamb and sheep and chicken run with me since I am this blissful vegetarian and all animals are my friends. I eat only as much as I need. There is a waterfall of carrot juice that I sip from. My world is free of chemotherapy and other nonsense that doctors and big pharma try to push in my world. I have found the cure that they are hiding for their profits. I run for exercise and I bathe in sunlight. I explore the majesty of nature and embrace the gift of my cancer as I chant “om” over and over again. You must think that this is what my life must become, right? This should be what I should do to “beat” cancer?
NOT!
Wake up you moron! You need more science in your life! Is this what you think a cancer patient should be doing?
Seriously for Pete’s sake stop asking me what I eat. Yes I have been diagnosed with cancer twice but it DOESNOT mean that cancer is because of kale or quinoa deficiency. Take your Skinny Trader Joe ass out of my face and move on. I have to go to an appointment. My doctor waits for me, yes that person who actually studied for many years about the intricacies of the human body and actually know a thing or two about how cancers evolve. No, I am not interested in your street corner chiropractic rant about Goji berry juice mixed with some back fixing. Go away, you and your advice . Go take a shower in your noni juice and while you are at it rub some aloe or whatever sick ass herb you think I should be taking.
Go away with your judgmental attitude and thoughts about how I brought this upon my own self and take you and your self occupied interest of why I got cancer, with you. If you want to know, go find a research lab so you can help all of us who are stuck in the cancer world. I am so tired of your questions.
No, cancer does not need body to be acidic or alkaline. Its a myth that has been debunked over and over and again. Our bodies manage the ph of our bodies very effectively on their own.
Why don’t you take two tablespoons of baking soda every night so you don’t get cancer and or better yet, go soak in some base if you know what that is.
I believe in complimentary care, using mindful healthy eating and exercising and keeping the weight normal. Believe me cancer patients existed before kale became a thing in the US and still exist after. These dietary fads are just that. There is no empirical data that puts kale at the helm of cancer destruction any more than spinach or collard greens. The idea is to eat a good amount of green leafy vegetables for everyone with or without cancer. Green juice is no magical cure. Anything that 16 I/V chemo infusions could not kill, your stupid kale smoothie wont, it just won’t.
A lot has to be said about good diet and eating in moderation. Smoked and grilled meats are considered to increase cancer risk. A good diet is balanced with good protein, vegetables and fruits.
Unfortunately because I didn’t “beat” cancer and live with stage 4, there will always be some woman who was fortunate with early stage cancer and survived (believe me I am so happy for you) who will keep on pandering her warped ideas about food and diet and people will listen because she survived. And she will never tell you how much medical treatment she did and what medications she took because that does not sell. Only the diet crazy stuff!
Left Boob Gone Rogue 
Love the Rant !!! Thank you for all your writings , they are all truly a gift.
Yes! Yes! Yes! And for those who are so attracted to, and force upon us, the benefits of essential oils and say “there’s an oil for that” (they only ever give me headaches
and the only benefit I see is the $$$ that goes into someone’s pocket for some un-pronounce-able oil), all I can say is “stop already!”
Exactly!
You are so authentic. So real. So enlightened. So human and oh so beautiful ! Keep spreading your light and humor. You “get” it!
Always in our prayers.
Go Get ‘me, Girlfriend. Keep it real. And Wonderful! Thanks.
I just love your posts! You are right, RIGHT, and right again…I’m saying it again RIGHT!
Thank you so much for this post. I agree with you 100%. I am early stage breast cancer survivor and I know I am alive (for now) because of medical science and amazing cancer team of doctors.
How about suggesting you could be cured by coffee enemas…seriously?! I am an RN who worked in hospice for much of my career and I’ve heard all of the fads and failed attempts. My own sister told me recently that she “can’t” get cancer as she eats healthily, exercises and used essential oils. I understand on an intellectual level that folks are usually trying to manage their own fears but damn it is annoying when the “advice” is ridiculous at best and harmful at its worst.
Maybe you should print copies your essay and just hand people a copy when the unsolicited advice starts and then walk away…
Here here!! Exactly !
Thank you for this! As a complimentary health practitioner I tell all of my clients to follow their doctor’s advice. I can’t tell you the number of times I have rolled my eyes when listening to a fellow practitioner give not-so-sound advice. I have chosen to help enhance individual’s lives by offering health coaching, massage and Reiki while respecting and working with those in the medical field.
I use the term “complimentary health practitioner” because I choose to work alongside the medical model, not against it. Thanks to cancer fighting drugs I have friends who are still alive; thanks to insulin my boyfriend is able to live a good life; thanks to antibiotics my elderly mother survived a staph infection.
Please keep writing, and doing what you do. The world needs more articles like this.
Did you forget sugar?
that’s a whole blog post in itself
Loved your rant.
Reblogged this on The Not Thin Man: The Chronicles of Nick and Norah and commented:
Thank you for the dose of reality.
Super love the opening fantasy. Also good to hear you letting out your frustration and anger with the good-health platitudes.
The variety of things promoted as cures for cancer are many. The different things suggested to me during my treatments are too many to mention. Much like the advice poured onto parents unsolicited advice for cancer patients can feel really judging and yucky. Information about anything that is aggressively given in an evangelical manner generally is more of a piss off than enlightening. Seems to me that cancer is very complex, and there are no silver bullets.
At the same time everyone needs to find their own magic to cope with life. Personally I have found that I am happiest when my choices resonate with me. I can tell you that I was growing and eating Kale for twenty years before it became a fad, and before I was diagnosed with cancer- and I still eat it, mostly just because I like it.
I say follow what feels healing for you. What helps you feel sparkly? What makes you smile? Probably not the forced good attitude smile, probably not dong anything motivated by SHOULD.
Warm regards-
I know a woman struck by cancer who lived clean and healthy her whole life, always ate organic foods. Eating healthy does not necessarily prevent cancer; it certainly won’t cure it. However, my friend isn’t smoking and eating pork rinds every day now. She is hoping, reasonably, that her lifestyle will be a factor in her fight against cancer.
I discovered your blog recently and admire your clarity and intelligence and am grateful you are writing it. Thank you and keep doing what you have to do to survive.
Hahaha. This actually made me laugh out loud. At first, I thought–Uzma has lost her mind. Thank goodness I spotted that “Not!” just down the page. Thank you so much for your writing.
👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼love
Absolutely true! I litterally had a stranger in Starbucks tell me I got cancer due to eating GMO corn!
Yep they all know , we are of course the idiots who didn’t read the memo. Sorry you had to deal with the nonsense
Loved the post! Made me laugh and smile 🙂
Of course eating healthy along with regular exercise is good, cancer or not. I have a friend who goes on and on about if my cousin with terminal brain cancer changed her diet she would be cured. How can people think it’s so black and white?! Anyhow, great post!